Honoring Aunt Nancy and Uncle Mike: A Week of Loss, Memory, and Gratitude

My uncle passed away at the end of November. He was my dad’s older brother, and I even wrote a story about him back in November. His memorial service was held this past Friday in Birmingham at Vestavia Hills Baptist Church. It was a beautiful service — but it was also where I learned heartbreaking news about my Aunt Nancy.

Aunt Nancy holding Julie: August 13, 2013

Aunt Nancy was the younger sister of my uncle Mike and my dad. I had just texted with her two days before Christmas, but her health had taken a sudden turn for the worse. Hospice had begun the very day of Mike’s service. After the memorial, Jenn, the girls, and I went to visit her at home since she was too weak to attend the service. I’m grateful we made that visit. She was alert, warm, and still very much herself. We talked about how everyone was doing, and then drifted into memories from long ago.

She told me the house was built in 1952. She was 15 when the family moved in, and Uncle Mike would marry my wonderful Aunt Ouida just a few months later. He never officially lived in that house, though he and Aunt Ouida would have moved into their own home in the early 60s. That 1952 house was my grandparents’ home — the place we visited every Christmas, usually arriving a day or two after the holiday. Even when Aunt Nancy wasn’t living there, we spent just as much time with her as we did with my grandparents.

The house still has its giant Magnolia tree out front. I can remember climbing that tree as a kid. We visited in the summers too. My grandparents were born in 1914 and 1915, and in the late 1990s, Aunt Nancy moved back into the house to care for my grandmother when she became ill. On Friday, she told me she had moved back into her same childhood bedroom. She lived in that house for the rest of her life. My grandfather passed in 1998, my grandmother in 1999. I even remember being there visiting when we heard the news of Princess Diana’s death.

Aunt Nancy passed away the next day — Saturday. We had just seen her the day before, and it still feels unreal how quickly everything happened. She was one of the most caring people you could ever hope to meet. She spoiled us at Christmas and on our birthdays. She and Uncle Mike rarely missed the girls’ birthday parties, even when it meant driving two or three hours. Whether it was the Children’s Museum in Chattanooga, the Chattanooga Zoo, the loud skating center, or even Callaway Gardens, they always showed up.

I also remember a wonderful visit with both her and Uncle Mike a month or so after my father passed away. We met at my sister’s house and spent the whole afternoon catching up and sharing memories. That’s who they were — present, loving, steady.

With Aunt Nancy’s passing, she became the last member of that generation on my father’s side of the family. It’s a sad milestone, but I take comfort in imagining her reunited with my dad, with Uncle Mike, and with their younger sister Kathy, who passed away in 1959 at just nine years old.

It has been a week of loss, but also a week of remembering the deep roots of our family — the house built in 1952, the Magnolia tree, the Christmas visits, the birthdays, the stories, and the love that stretched across decades. I’m grateful for the time we had with both Aunt Nancy and Uncle Mike, and for the legacy of kindness and presence they leave behind.

Her service will be this upcoming Wednesday at Shades Mountain Baptist Church. It will be my second trip to Birmingham in a week, but I would not miss it for the world.

Caroline’s Dedication at Church: June 4, 2017

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